The Angry Singlespeeder: Foaming at the mouth about CrossVegas
Photo by Meg McMahon/megmcmahon.com
The images coming from last week’s CrossVegas event displayed a who’s who in the world of professional cyclocross racing. To have European icons like Sven Nys and Lars Van der Haar in attendance is an indication that CrossVegas has truly arrived as a world-class cyclocross event.
So if CrossVegas is a world-class cyclocross event, why is it then that on the very same night I saw an image of Team Luna Chix rider Katerina Nash getting sprayed in the face with a filthy PBR by some classless spectating douchebags? After the event, Katerina was incredibly cool about the whole thing and even had a smile on her face when asked about getting sprayed with beer. I’m not sure if she was sincere about it or just deflecting the controversy, but either way, she handled the situation far better than I would have.
The adolescent beer spray party continued into the men’s race and became such an issue that Van Der Haar was quoted afterward as saying “If they keep throwing beer, I’m not coming back. That’s not cycling, that’s not cyclocross, so please stop doing that.”
“At least have the common decency to spray a beer of some remote quality in my face. A PBR hardly even qualifies as refrigerated monkey piss.”
I’m all for having a good time on the race course and have been known to take more than a couple beer hand-ups, but having that beer sprayed in my face is where I draw the line. How come it’s unacceptable in most social situations to spray beer in another person’s face, but suddenly when they don Lycra and race around in a circle on a bike as hard as they can it becomes justifiable?
Photo by A.E. Landes Photography/www.aelandesphotography.com
On the bike or not, if some schmucktard sprayed a beer in my face, we’d be having some choice words right then and there on the race course. At least have the common decency to spray a beer of some remote quality in my face. A PBR hardly even qualifies as refrigerated monkey piss.
It seems to me that there’s been a recent trend surrounding the concept of forced fun and the belief that racing is for losers. I got a healthy dose of it earlier this year at Singlespeed Worlds in Anchorage, and this latest act of douchebaggery further proves to me how selfish and inconsiderate people can be.
Want to offer me a beer, whiskey, bacon, pizza or some other kind of hand-up? Cool. I might take it. I might not. It depends on how close to vomiting I am at that particular moment. Want to heckle me, call me a pussy and say pedal harder? Sure. No problem. It’s good motivation. Besides, they’re only words. But taking the liberty to just spray some refrigerated monkey piss in my face crosses the line. It’s unacceptable no matter how cool you may look in front of your halfwit friends.
Your version of fun may be different than someone else’s, and that is what’s so great about events like CrossVegas; both versions can exist. But as soon as you force your version of fun on someone else – or spray it in their face – suddenly the universal fun stops and people get angry.
I don’t know where this kind of behavior comes from, but I’m sure it has something to do with today’s entitlement culture. This is especially prevalent here in the United States where certain individuals believe they have the right to do what they want because their mommy and daddy always told them that they’re special and that everyone’s a winner; which is probably what has given birth to the whole “racing is for losers” phenomenon.
Well here’s some news, chief. You’re not special. And if you think racing is for losers, then don’t show up to a race and heckle people for getting out there and toeing the line. Go get plastered in the woods with all your entitled anti-race blockheads and spray beer on each other. Nobody wants you at an event like CrossVegas anyway.
Photo by A.E. Landes Photography/www.aelandesphotography.com
Whether you’re an event organizer, participant or spectator, there is a code of conduct that should always be followed and respected. For organizers, it’s about providing a venue where everyone can have a good time in their own way, for participants its about acting with sportsmanship toward your fellow competitors and for spectators its about enjoying the show without getting in the way of those who are performing.
I don’t know why these concepts are so hard for some people to grasp. As much as I like to compete, I also go through phases where I don’t want to race or be competitive. All I want to do is just enjoy riding and exploring. But I’m not going to badmouth, heckle or toy with someone who is hell bent to get out there and race. And I’m sure as hell not going to spray refrigerated monkey piss in their face.
Editor’s Note: The Angry Singlespeeder is a collection of mercurial musings from contributing editor Kurt Gensheimer. In no way do his maniacal diatribes about all things bike oriented represent the opinions of Mtbr, RoadBikeReview, or any of their employees, contractors, janitorial staff, family members, household pets, or any other creature, living or dead. You can submit questions or comments to Kurt at singlespeeder@consumerreview.com. And make sure to check out Kurt’s previous columns.
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